Companions for the Journey

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10   Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

One of the quotes by Henry David Thoreau that is etched in my mind [and there are a lot of them; I did my senior thesis on him] is, "My friend shall forever be my friend and reflect a ray of God toward me."  Poor HDT was always looking for the "perfect" in this world, and always being frustrated by the lack of it.  Friendship was no different - he wrote many pages on the idea of friendship but had few close friends, and drifted apart from most of those he did have in the course of his life.  Unlike the True Friend envisioned in his quote above, there was no one to always be his friend, or to direct a ray of God toward him.

The life lived in Christ, however, should embody that ideal.  If we are to be brothers and sisters to each other, we are certainly called to be friends to each other, and in our friendship we will shine the love of God upon each other.

The writer of Ecclesiastes can be dark and pessimistic in tone, but when he turns to friendship, he shares true and heartening insights:

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.   Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.  But how can one keep warm alone?  Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Jesus puts this wisdom into direct action when he sends out the Apostles (Mark 6:7) and then the Seventy-Two (Luke 10:1) to minister, "two by two."   These early Christians could support, protect, and advise each other, just as we can today.

I have been superbly blessed over the years by a large number of friends.  I have drifted apart from some over time, as happens with anyone, though in other cases miles and years have not dampened our ties.  And as the years go by new friends emerge, unexpectedly.  Over time I am impressed more and more by how crucial we are to each other, and how God has literally designed friendship as a tool for surviving in a world frought with snares and pitfalls.  He gives us to each other, for a season or for a lifetime, but in all cases we are gifts of God, one to each other.

John, the friend of Christ, the wise sage who writes in old age to the church, declares, "This is the message you heard from the beginning: we should love one another." (1 John 3:11)  In so many cases it is as simple as that: love one another - "reflect a ray of God to me," to you.  But to underscore the point, John goes one step further: "Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." (1 John 3:18)

Jesus is our friend; the old camp songs proclaim this.  But he also sends us friends, to lift us up, to keep us warm, to fight our battles.  Be grateful he does, and always be ready and waiting for the next friend sent to you - and to whom you are sent - and thank God for them.

Rule #1: Be Nice

Galatians 6:9-10  Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

I was speaking with a good friend recently about the basics of Christian teaching, when I recalled a great statement from a great sermon: "You don't have to be a trained soul-winner to be nice to people."

That memorable sentence came from Nazarene General Superintendent J.K. Warrick and when I heard it, in 2013, I immediately wrote it down. That statement is so special because, oftentimes, it really is that simple! 

Few believers are capable, or called, for that matter, to stand on street corners or go door to door, confronting complete strangers with the Gospel. I have seen this sort of public evangelism done in a powerful way by people specially anointed for this work, able to be true witnesses and cause people to stop and think. I have also seen it done quite ineffectively. Exiting a Boston Red Sox game one day, I headed back toward the subway (the "T") along with a friend of mine, an Orthodox Jew. We were moving along in a throng of people and in our midst was a street preacher, yelling at everyone passing by. As we came beside him, his eyes caught my friends' eyes for a mere second and the man yelled out, "Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?!" A step or two later, out of any earshot, my friend calmly answered, "Well, actually, no."

We are not instructed to wade into crowds and rant and rave, but we are instructed to care about people, to love people, and to do good. Paul's point to the Galatians was that doing good for others sows the seeds of faith. If we do not give up,someday there will be a harvest.

The United Methodist Church ran a television commercial several years ago depicting a true story. In the ad, a young boy and his friends break into the basement of a church in order to play pool on the pool table stored there. The minister of the church apparently figures out the boys are breaking in to do this and surprises them one day. He approached the young ring-leader, who is obviously certain he is about to end up in a load of trouble. But then the minister hands the boy a key to the building. The commercial ends with a shot of the surprised (and relieved) boy and the caption, "Now a pastor." It was a great vignette about how acting in love - and acting counter to this world's expectations - can transform a life for Christ.

The Apostle Peter shares a similar lesson, saying, "Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us." It seems like common sense - people will open their eyes to Jesus if Christians act like we are called to act. It may be over-quoted, but St. Francis of Assisi hit upon an eternal truth when he advised, "Preach the Gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words." Why does this seem so hard for some Christians to understand and implement? Perhaps it is due to the brand of Christianity some of them have encountered themselves. But if we are to take Jesus seriously, we will realize that the prime key to sharing our faith with others is by treating people well. And Paul makes it clear - that starts within the church: "...let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." He does not add these words because believers deserve special treatment, but because how we treat each other is a basis for our witness. This is why Christ told his followers:

 “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)

No one will believe our Gospel if we don't treat them with love. Nor will they believe us if we are not treating each other with love. So remember, day after day, hour after hour, it's quite simple. Don't grow weary in doing good. Because, "You don't have to be a trained soul-winner to be nice to people."